亲子

　　标题：ThreeLessonsChildrenNeedtoLearnAboutCandy
　　source：psychologytoday丨byDinaRosePh。D。
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　　Nowthatschoolandschoolsportsareinfullswing，weveenteredpeakperiodforfoodtrophies。YouknowwhatImean，thecupcakeor，justaslikely，thesackofcandykidsearnbywinningsomesortofcompetitition。
　　Sometimeskidsearntheirprizesjustforshowingup。（And，letsfaceit，kidsshowupalot。）Sofoodtrophiesaretricky。
　　Onemomsummedupherdilemmalikethis：
　　Itdoesntseemfairtotakeawaymysonsprize。Afterall，heearnedit。
　　Idontwanthimtoeatsomuchcandy。
　　Thismothersolvedthesituationwithastealthattack。Everynightafterhersonwenttobed，shesnuckintothekitchenandthrewoutsomeofthestash。
　　Soheresthequestion：Isitfairforparentstosecretlydiscardtheirkidscandy？
　　Forgetthefact，justforamoment，thatitsashamethatcompetitionorganizers（andothers）oftendecidetousesweetsasaprize。
　　And，forgettoo，thatthisisavariationoftheproblemeveryparentexperiencesonHalloween。
　　Weretalkingabouttheconceptoffairhere。
　　Iagreewiththismotherthatitwouldntbefairforhertotakeawaytheprizehersonearnedfordoingsomethingfabulous。Butwhydoesshethinkitisfairtodiscardhersonscandyprizesurreptitiously？
　　Isuspectitsbecauseshehasntthoughtabouthersecretsolutioninquitethisway。Rather，shehasonlythoughtaboutheractionsasapracticalsolutiontoaperpelexingproblem。
　　AndIgetit。1）Candyaintbroccoli。2）KidswhogorgeoncandycanbehowshallIputthisnicely？pesky。
　　Butthinkaboutwhatsneakyparentingteacheskidsaboutfairness。ItsOKtodowhateveryouwantaslongasyourmotivesaregood。。。andyoudontgetcaught？
　　Thesolutiontosolvingthefoodtrophydilemmaistorethinktheideaoffair。
　　Whenitcomestoeating，fairisntnecessarilyeatingwhatorhowmucheveryoneelseiseating。Fairalsoisntalwayseatinghowevermuchyouhappentohaveinyourhand。Fairiseatingtheamountthatsrightforyouataparticulartime。
　　Itsfairwhenbigkidsgetalargerglassofchocolatemilkthensmallkidsbecausemilksizeoughttobearsomerelationtotummysize。
　　Itsfairwhenonechildgetsacookiewhenanotherchilddoesnt，ifthefirstchildhasnthadanysweetsortreatstodayandtheotheronejustcamefromaparty。
　　depositphotos
　　Source：depositphotos
　　Inthiscase，itisdefinitelyfairtoletkidskeeptheircandy。Afterall，itstheirprize。Itmightnotbefair，however，toletthemeatthecandyrightaway。And，dependingonthesizeofthetrophy，itsprobablynotfairtoletkidspowerdowntheirprizeinonesitting。
　　Iknowitfeelslikelettingchildrenkeeptheircandycanonlyleadtoproblems。Butteachingchildrenthewrongideaaboutwhatsfaircanleadtobadeatinghabits。Andreducingconflictbyperformingsomemidnightmagicisashorttermsolutiontoalongtermproblem。
　　ThreeLessonsaboutCandythatAllChildrenNeedtoLearn
　　ItsOKtohaveoneortwosmallpiecesofcandyeveryday。However。。。
　　Ifyoueatcandyeverydayyouwilluseupyoursweetsandtreatsbudget。Thatmeans。。。
　　Youhavetomakechoices。Youcanteatcandyandcupcakeseveryday。Youalsocanteatcandyandchips，candyandcookies，orevencandyandchocolatemilkeveryday。
　　Dontthinkyoucantrustyourkidstomaketherightdecisionsinthefaceofallthosesweets？Considerthis：Abundanceisntreallytheproblem。
　　Rather，theproblemparentsfacewhentheirkidsencountercandycomesfromnotteachingchildrentocopewiththecandythemselves。
　　Changingtheconversationfromnutritiontohabits。